That's All I Have To Say About That (My Manifesto)

Well Mr. Simon has been getting his writing thing on for the last few months and I on the other hand have been silent. Well I am announcing that I am making a return and the column popularly know as "That’s All I Have to Say About That" will be making a return in the near future. While Mr. Simon typically deals with relationships and the ladies in his rants I typically deal with observations about life, media, and black folks. But before I return I need to let people who don’t know me, know who I am. So to do that I present my Manifesto (by the way I borrowed this from Scoop Jackson). 100 Statements about what I believe:

1. I believe that professional athletes shouldn’t get married until they are 29.
2. I believe that the Music Industry has lost its way.
3. I believe that BET is doing a disservice to our race.
4. I believe that people need to listen to Bill Cosby.
5. I believe that people need to stop listening to Jessie Jackson (that is if they haven’t already stopped).
6. I believe that women who intimately know about sports are more likely to get the guy.
7. I believe that once nice guys reach their late twenties women will regret passing on them in favor of guys with issues.
8. I believe that women think they can mold men.
9. I believe that nice guys will get women back in their late twenties for being passed over in their early twenties.
10. I believe men can’t be molded by women.
11. I believe that a bra and panties should match.
12. I believe that at a party no more than three reggae songs should be played back to back.
13. I believe that Biz has lost it.
14. I believe that Jay Z benefited more than anyone from the deaths of BIG and 2 Pac.
15. I believe Kobe needs Shaq and Shaq doesn’t need Kobe.
16. I believe Magic not Mike was the greatest ever and that neither of them can hold a candle to Russell.
17. I believe that the cut back is a lost art form.
18. I believe that despite Lebron, Kobe, McGrady and Garnett, high schoolers should go to college rather than the NBA.
19. I believe that Tony Parker is my hero.
20. I believe that Erica Badu has mysterious powers over men.
21. I believe Angelina broke up Brad and Jen, and I understand why.
22. I believe there is absolutely no reason why Michael Michelle should be attending award shows by herself.
23. I believe that in the next 50 years technology will change our lives more than it has from the beginning of time up until now.
24. I believe if I have a son, I will make sure that he is a jump shooter.
25. I believe white women are easier to approach.
26. I believe that black women could learn a few things from white women.
27. I believe that there is nothing more beautiful than a black woman.
28. I believe that beauty isn’t everything.
29. I believe that if the sex is wack and you continue to have it, then you need to blame yourself not the other person.
30. I believe that the Boondocks, printed daily in hundreds of newspapers, is one of the greatest achievements of the post civil rights era.
31. I believe that you can no longer go to school to be a sportscaster.
32. I believe that you shouldn’t ask why I have to watch Sportscenter multiple times a day.
33. I believe that race will never go away.
34. I believe that I deserve my 40 arces and a Mule and I believe that I will never get it.
35. I believe that the gap between the wealthy and the poor is getting larger.
36. I believe I would feel better about Corporate America if more people looked like me.
37. I believe that the black male is getting lost in the shuffle.
38. I believe that music and sports are the only things that unify races.
39. I believe Free has a Big O’l Butt.
40. I believe J Lo’s butt is disappearing.
41. I believe Mr. Simon has shown us the way.
42. I believe I never told D. Mendez how much I loved her.
43. I believe despite the fact I never told her she knew and still made the wrong decision.
44. I believe there will be another time in another life.
45. I believe the Sports Guy writes what I think.
46. I believe Questlove may be the greatest DJ ever.
47. I believe Steven A. Smith is annoying.
48. I believe that it is unfortunately that Bill Walton doesn’t stutter anymore.
49. I believe that if I could spell I would rule the world.
50. I believe that men can be shady.
51. I believe that women are shady.
52. I believe that women will never get along with other women.
53. I believe that the next person you date will benefit from the last person you dated.
54. I believe that The Autobiography of Malcolm X changed my life.
55. I believe that if I had to choose one (sight or hearing) I would choose hearing without hesitation.
56. I believe I am truly upset that the grenade malfunctioned.
57. I believe Outkast is our Pink Floyd.
58. I believe Hip Hop is beginning to loose its way.
59. I believe John Madden football is the greatest game ever.
60. I believe Sundays are for the NFL.
61. I believe that when all is said and done, I will probably be moving boxes for a long time.
62. I believe that E. Fountain and Ric Simon will be there with me.
63. I believe that religion is one of the greatest dividing factors in the world.
64. I believe that events in the Torra, Koran and Bible overlap.
65. I believe therefore that most religions originated from the same place and are different people’s interpretations.
66. I believe that many of the people in the Church on Sunday were the same people getting crunk in the club on Saturday.
67. I believe that preaching is the new hustle.
68. I believe that capitalism is the best economic theory.
69. I believe it is unfortunate that socialism doesn’t work.
70. I believe that there are still many scars from slavery.
71. I believe FAMU was the best decision I could have made.
72. I believe that the Hundred is the best band in the land.
73. I believe Charlie Rose is the best interviewer on tv.
74. I believe people get married too soon.
75. I believe in American, if you are the best at what you do, you can be rich regardless of what you do.
76. I believe that Jerry should have retired 3 years ago.
77. I believe that woman always have been and always will be the cause on men’s downfalls.
78. I believe that women should rule the world.
79. I believe that they don’t because they don’t know.
80. I believe that TO deserves to get paid but shouldn’t be asking for it.
81. I believe that we have already had two black presidents.
82. I believe that money and wealth ruins artists.
83. I believe that Bill O’Riley is selling snake oil to the masses.
84. I believe that someday I will find my way in my career.
85. I believe I wish that day was today.
86. I believe educated black people should blame themselves for the cancellation of Kevin Hill.
87. I believe that the cancellation of Kevin Hill demonstrates why we will always have to COON for television audiences.
88. I believe that Dave Chappelle is ground breaking.
89. I believe that my father is my role model.
90. I believe that everyone needs to see the Roots perform at least once.
91. I believe that Kanye’s head will break his neck
92 I believe that 50 won’t make it to 50.
93. I believe that a Maybach looks like a Lincoln with a curtain.
94. I believe that Don Cheedle and Terrence Howard deserve a couple of gold statues.
95. I believe that three can be better than two but that two is more manageable than three consequently, I am in favor of two.
96. I believe if Stedman doesn’t want to marry Oprah, I will.
97. I believe that Fall is much better than Love Jones.
98. I believe love is an important thing to have in life.
99. I believe that family is the most important thing we have.
100. But mostly I believe in my brothas and sisters like no other.